The new infographic on Equal Share Communication is ready! I hope you will find it useful in your daily interactions with other people from your own and other cultures. I am curious how it will work for you in your daily interactions.
The full descriptive version of the 7 tips can be found here. Equal Share Communication is suitable for use both on the interpersonal and intercultural level. It is a way of communicating based on mindfulness - the practice of awareness and making a conscious choice of being present in every moment of your life. One of my inspirations was also Zen Coaching and my practice as a coach.
So how to transform your life through Equal Share Communication?
Read the infographic carefully along with the full version of the 7 tips that can be found here. Notice which item is the most relevant for you right now, in this moment of your life. Start practising with that. Then step by step start adding other items and watch your life and relations get better. Initially practise as often as you can remember and later try to make it your attitude to respect both your own and the other person's 50% share in every interaction.
One of the biggest challenges that some people experience is lack of agreement to accept the other person's Zone of Personal Freedom just as it is here and now, even when there is no risk to each of the parties' health or life, or when the public good is not at risk.
Equal Share Communication allows our emotions and thoughts to surface, so they become visible to ourselves with full awareness. You may notice that there is a huge urge in you (your Inner Pusher/Controller) to control EVERYTHING around you, even the things that are not really your responsibility.
Imagine that you are talking to a few people at dinner and then suddenly there is silence. Everybody is chewing on their food busily. Are you comfortable with that silence or do you find it awkward and uncomfortable? Would you feel responsible to say something to break the silence? Have you ever had experiences like that with different people in your life? Silence just is. It is not positive or negative, comfortable or uncomfortable. But how you react to it is always your choice. It can be very educational once you choose to pay attention to what thoughts and emotions show up in you and how you CHOOSE to react to them.
When learning how to politely but firmly protect your 50% of 'shares' in your daily interactions, you will notice that some people would prefer the 'old you' who communicated in your old ways, so you are likely to face some resistance from your loved ones, friends or co-workers etc. "Resistance is useless" though, because once you start using this way of communicating, it will gradually influence others around you, too. Other people love to be seen, listened to and treated with respect.
This way of communicating is also likely to reveal who will have to go from your life and who is a life-long keeper. The keepers will choose to grow with you. Learn to wave good bye to all those who try to manipulate you and cannot see your value no matter what you do (or don't do). Be grateful to them for the life lesson they gave you and let them go.
Your 50% share in every interaction is also your own ZPF - Zone of Personal Freedom. As you can see in item 2 of the infographic: 'If what the other person is communicating or doing within their 50% of shares does not pose a threat to our lives, health or the public good, there is no need to correct / fix part or all of the 50% of ‘share’ of the other person'.
I look forward to your comments in the space under the article.
For the Polish version click here
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